“Mutual submission” between husbands and wives is unbiblical

I have seen this “mutual submission” idea promoted a few times and it’s based on Genesis 3:16 and Ephesians 5 (specifically 5:21). I was going to write my own post on the topic but I found an amazing article from Crisis Magazine. It was written by Josh Kusch four years ago and if you only read one article about this, it should be this one. I am going to share some parts of it here, but visit this link so you can read the entire piece on your own.

“Does Ephesians 5 teach mutual submission among spouses? As plausible as this reading is on a superficial level, it is almost certainly wrong, for a number of reasons” (Kusch).

I want to focus on three points here:

1. Sacrifice does not necessarily mean submission.

2. The submission of wives if God’s original design and not a result of the Fall.

3. “Mutual submission” undermines the Christ-Church analogy of Ephesians 5.

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One important thing to note is that submission and sacrifice are not necessarily interchangeable: “Moreover, as almost all commentators agree, v. 21 (“submitting to one another out of the fear of Christ”) functions as a transition and as a kind of heading for the “household code” (Haustafel) that follows. Therefore, to be consistent, advocates of the mutual submission interpretation must apply v. 21 not only to spouses but also to the relationship between parents and children, masters and slaves, as indeed a number of them do. But given the way hypotassō is used in the New Testament, with its specific connotation of submission to an authority, it seems highly unlikely that Paul is enjoining parents to submit to their children! It is true of course that there is an element of reciprocity in all of these examples: Alongside the exhortations to wives, children, and slaves, husbands are told to love their wives, parents are told not to provoke their children to anger, and masters are told not to threaten their slaves. But can this reciprocity be called mutual submission? Being mild with one’s subordinates is to be commended, but it is not remotely synonymous with being submissive to them. The husband’s Christ-like love should involve a great deal of sacrifice, but submission and sacrifice are not interchangeable” (Kusch).

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The submission of wives is God’s original design and not a result of the Fall: “In truth, however, Paul’s teaching on male headship is informed not by Greco-Roman culture but by his Christological reading of the Old Testament: for Paul clearly sees male authority not as a consequence of the fall but as inherent in the original design of creation (cf. 1 Cor. 11:3-12; 1 Tim. 2:11-13), a design which the order of grace does not destroy but rather perfects. And this is why, moreover, male headship is in no way comparable to slavery, despite the facile claims made by some” (Kusch).

The claim that the submission of wives is only a result of the Fall does not make sense when you read the several New Testament passages on marriage. This novelty comes from Genesis 3:16: “To the woman also he said: I will multiply thy sorrows, and thy conceptions. In sorrow shalt thou bring forth children, and thou shalt be under thy husband’s power, and he shall have dominion over thee.” However, that is not what the verse actually means. On this topic, the website Scripture Catholic says: “Gen. 3:16 – in fact, God revealed that women would want to usurp their husband’s authority as the result of the original sin. After the original sin, God tells Eve: “Yet your desire shall be for your husband, and he shall rule over you.” Thus, as a result of the original sin, Eve would desire to rule over Adam, but God ensured that Adam would rule over Eve.”

The Haydock commentary on Genesis 3:16 says: “Moses here shews the ORIGINAL AND NATURAL SUBJECTION OF WIVES TO THEIR HUSBANDS [emphasis mine], in oppositition to the Egyptians, who, to honour Isis, gave women the superiority by the marriage contract.”

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“Mutual submission” undermines the Christ-Church analogy of Ephesians 5: “While the husband is told to love his wife as Christ loves the Church (a truly imposing command), the verses directed toward the wife clearly place her in a subordinate position with regard to her husband, who is depicted as a kind of vicar of Christ himself. Thus in v. 22 the wife is told to submit to her husband “as to the Lord,” and v. 24 tells the wife to “submit” to her husband “in all things” “as” the Church submits to Christ. Less egalitarian language is scarcely imaginable. Moreover, this submission is comprehensive and would seem to rule out the kind of alternating submission advocated by some. For if the wife submits to the husband in “all things,” then where precisely is the husband supposed to submit to the wife?” (Kusch).

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I focused on these points because they better explain the same thoughts that I had while reading marriage prep materials.

We need to remember that the final battle is on marriage and the family. Doesn’t it seem like the headship of husbands is being attacked? Let’s pray for bold hearts that proclaim His whole truth to the world unapologetically!

Share the Crisis Magazine article far and wide, especially with courting, engaged, and married couples.